Oprah Winfrey is dead
I awoke to tiny squeaks. Suddenly, being quiet is not so critical when you are ankle deep in glue. Anyway, Oprah Winfrey was pissed off to see me and began to flail about. I think the glue trap ended up about 4 feet from where I had originally left it. After she wore herself out, I snapped a picture of my little captive and went out back to fill a bucket with water. I honestly thought Oprah Winfrey would have lasted a bit longer, but she drowned in 20 seconds.
Now I must disinfect my counters.
Now I must disinfect my counters.
posted by jks_ at 3:51 PM
4 Comments:
your DROWNED her???? why didn't you just get snap traps? she is so cute! btw, thanks to your anal-bleeding cartoons, i had a dream about audrey dismboweling a live racoon because it didn't like her poetry. and then, covered in blood, she made out with some guy. maybe it wasn't the cartoons. maybe it's all the drugs.
"BAROOMROOMROOMROOM!"
don't be jealous, grasshopper. one day, you too, will be able to express yourself robustly as i have done.
how could you possibly be dissapointed?? it has all the good for an epic feel good. killing evil self ritous ho's, rodents, blood, i get to make out. it's all good.
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